Once you've set yourself a goal - whatever it is - it's very tempting to broadcast your intentions to the world. Some say that telling everyone you've decided to give up smoking, learn to run, lose half a stone is the best way to make sure you stick to your plans.
But Jessica McGregor Johnson, author of The Right T-Shirt insists that making your resolutions public from day one is definitely not a good idea.
'These are heart-felt goals that are tender and can get crushed all too easily,' she says. 'Your goals need to grow in a protected environment for a while until they are so strong they are like bamboo shoots: whatever happens they will spring back.'
Jessica explains, 'Some friends look like supporters but in fact at the first sign of adversity they will say, 'don’t worry, you tried, you can give up now'. And they don’t say that because they do not love you, but rather because your change challenges them. These are your soft enemies and you certainly don’t want to tell them your goals.'
Beware too your bitter enemies, Jessica warns. 'These are more obvious, the people who are always negative no matter what idea you come up with. The ones who will shoot down an idea before you’ve even finished the sentence. Don’t share your goals with them either.'
It's obviously a battlefield out there, so who can you confide in?
Your cheerleaders, says Jessica. 'These are the people in your life who will always stand by your side cheering you on with great big red pom-poms in both hands. They will help you stay strong if you flag along the path to achieving your goals.'
So pick the people you share your goals with carefully. Look for an accountability buddy - someone you trust to keep you going. This will probably be someone who, like you, is also striving to reach a goal albeit a different one. Maybe you're trying to stick to a diet while she is training for an event. Or perhaps one of you is trying to set up a business while the other is learning a new skill.
Jessica says, 'When I wrote my book, I had an accountability buddy. We would speak every week and support each other in our respective goals. At the end of each call we would commit to what we wanted to achieve in the next week. In that way we supported each other. And, if either of us did not do what we had committed to, we looked at why and what we needed to do to catch up.'
Once you're a way down the path towards your goal, there will come a point when you are so committed that there really is no turning back. You have changed your mindset and your approach to whatever it is you are going to achieve. Now is the time to share your goals and dreams with whoever you like, because nothing and no one can put you off track.
Jessica says, 'By sharing your goals and dreams at this point, you are so full of enthusiasm and passion that it is catching.' Friends, family and colleagues may even have fresh ideas about how you can achieve your dream. 'By nurturing your goal until it gets to this place of clarity and passion you will be giving yourself the best possible chance of success and nothing will hold you back.'
Jessica McGregor Johnson, author of ‘The Right T-Shirt: write your own rules and live the life you want', has worked internationally as a life coach for nine years empowering women to go out and live the life they choose.
